Gamers like hobbits and gamers like lists of gear, ergo gamers like lists of hobbit gear. This is a song about a hobbit checking to make sure he's properly attired for his night at the pub. It's a filk tune played by Marc Gunn using only an autoharp and it sounds right out of the Renaissance Faire. It's also a cumulative song, meaning there's a list of items in the verse that grows one item longer every time the verse is sung. By the time the song ends it's been sped up and the list has grown so long that listeners can't keep up with singing along. A Well-Dressed Hobbit has been called the "hobbits' version"* of The Rattlin' Bog, which is a popular Irish folk tune.
A Well-Dressed Hobbit is from Marc Gunn's 2011 album, Don't Go Drinking with Hobbits. Expect more from this album to appear on X Marks the Beat.
A Well-Dressed Hobbit on Google Play
* Quote taken from The FuMP.
Note: "trews" are a type of Scottish trouser.
A Well-Dressed Hobbit lyrics
A well-dressed hobbit braids his toes
Because it is the fashion, oh
A well-dressed hobbit braids his toes
To go down to the pub, you know
And then he puts on his best trews
Because it is the fashion, oh
With his best trews and braided toes
To go down to the pub, you know
He fastens up his braces tight
To make sure that his trews hang right
Braces tight, his best trews and braided toes
To go down to the pub, you know
Next he fastens up his shirt
With buttons sewn by Grandma Gert
His Gert shirt, braces tight, his best trews and braided toes
To go down to the pub, you know
Next he tops it with a vest
Which pulls real tight across his chest
Vest, his shirt, braces tight, his best trews and braided toes
To go down to the pub, you know
And in one pocket watch and chain
So he’ll know to come home again
Watch, vest, shirt, braces tight, his best trews and braided toes
To go down to the pub, you know
In the other pocket his pipe goes
To make the smoke rings that he blows,
Smoke ring pipe, watch, vest, shirt, braces tight, his best trews and braided toes
To go down to the pub, you know
And with his pipe he has long leaf
’Cause no tobacco leads to grief
Long leaf, pipe, watch, vest, shirt, braces tight, his best trews and braided toes
To go down to the pub, you know
And over all he wears a coat
To make sure his couture is haute
His haute coat, long leaf, pipe, watch, vest, shirt, braces tight, his best trews and braided toes
To go down to the pub, you know
And last he often adds a hat
So his hair stays nice and flat
Hat, haute coat, long leaf, pipe, watch, vest, shirt, braces tight, his best trews and braided toes
To go down to the pub, you know
And in one hand he totes a mug
The better for his ale to glug
Mug, hat, coat, long leaf, pipe, watch, vest, shirt, braces tight, his best trews and braided toes
To go down to the pub, you know
And finally his walking stick
To keep his footing on the brick
Walking stick, mug, hat, coat, long leaf, pipe, watch, vest, shirt, braces tight, his best trews and braided toes
To go down to the pub, you know
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